Chapter of the wind

All those little things I had

Days filled with feelings

Emotions I couldn’t deal with

My smiles, tears, highs and lows

Were meant to be only yours

Piles of black dots danced on meadows of white

Composing shapes, words, verses soft as twilight

Chapters now left undone,

With all the promise of could

This story will hide them all, for good

In plane words my soul in your hands I would keep

But the warmth between us, you threw it away

With love never meant to be, you put it forever to sleep

Now finally I can set you free and move on

And write the beautiful chapter of the wind - gone

I dream of what was and what could have been

I will hold this dream in years to come

Keep it to myself to remain unseen

To you dear traveler who has run through all this muck,

I bid farewell and wish the best of luck

Ne ponovo

Ovo nije trebalo da se desi

Al život ide dalje i ja ću nastaviti sa njim

Udahni ljubav duboko

Dok mislim na tebe

Da, misliću, al ne bih trebala

Ne ovog puta, ne, ne ponovo

Ovo nije trebalo da se desi na ovaj način

Ne ovog puta, pogotovo ne ova stvar

Mnoge stvari nisu trebale, pa ipak budu

Život ide dalje i ja ću nastaviti s njim

Da, misliću na tebe

Dok koračam praznom stazom

Svaki put kad pokušam da zaboravim

Iz sećanja ne mogu da te izbrišem

Tebe sam trebala tada

Mislila da si ti onaj kojeg ja želim

Svo ovo vreme tvoja sreća

Moje snove je ispunjavala

Sve one bitke, male i velike

Svaku suzu, osmeh ili sreću

Borila sam ih strpljivo iza zatvorenih vrata

Oh, nemoj pustiti moju ruku sada

Zgrabi sva obećanja ona

I cenu koju ljubav je platila

Dopusti mi da te volim polako

Učim kako da voliš sebe, mene, nas

Odluči da svaki dan ljubav meni daš

Na koji god način

Kad ikad pomisliš otići

Ne zaboravi povesti i mene

U trenutku umeš zavrteti moja osećanja

Ne govori, ni reč, ne ako nije stvarna

Tišina je lepša od laži koje čujem

U sebi ih drži bez njih mogu da živim

Ali udahnuti ne mogu

Bez da držim te za ruku

Znam, ne razumeš moju muku

Ne brini, snaćiću se u životu bez tebe

Na tren si pustio moju ruku

Poveo si nju umesto mene

Više  nema tvog dodira na mom struku

Al još posećuješ moje noći snene

Sreću moju sad poklanjaš njoj

Nemam izbor, ovaj život nije više moj

Priče lepe ti joj skroj

Već kad ima pogled tvoj

Čudno boli taj vaš spoj

Uživajte u sreći svoj

Virtuous woman

           When someone tells you that you are created in God's image, what does it represent for you? Do we immediately think about God's character and try to imagine what God looks like?

            We as women have a very important role in society and the family. If set properly, everything will be fine. We have strong characters and if it is not formed as it should be, characters of the people around us will also be out of balance. In essence, we need to be simple, modest and humble, and those three things include such characteristics, it is a virtuous woman is essentially difficult to describe briefly. The topic is very broad and complex, in a shortest explanation, any feature that is mentioned in the Bible, it is desirable for us to have it. It is difficult to reach, but we as women have our own place in society, and God for us has a special plan.

            There are lots of verses which are talking about how woman should act and look. Mostly, they refer to her family and married life. One part in particular is on my mind whenever I think about who should I be and it is written in Proverbs 31.

¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. ¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. ¹² She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. ¹³ She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. ¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. ¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. ¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. ¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. ¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. ¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. ²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. ²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. ²² She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. ²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. ²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. ²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. ²⁶ She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. ²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. ²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ²⁹ “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” ³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. ³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

            The word virtuous or noble is used for someone who has a great dignity. There are many women, but rarely are they noble. Women who belong to God are excellent. So, we are worth more than the pearl, rubies. Pearls are rare, hard to find and long form. Interestingly, the pearl is created from sand at the bottom of the sea, in the belly of the shell. The sand is coated with substance called nacre and that makes it more valuable and special. Nothing like that cannot be found anywhere else. Imagine how valuable we are to God when we are more valuable than pearls to him. The question in 10th verse is - Who's going to find a virtuous woman, who is worthy to possess her, to be her husband and that he goes through life. Her husband should be able to rely on her to have confidence in her. This means that she is: honest, faithful, trusted, wise, to love God and follow His will. She takes care of him, does him well. But this is also a question of who's going to find her. It is not completely about virtuous woman but also of a man of God. If a woman is noble, you have to have a man of God who will deserve to have her.

            Search for wool and flax refers to the fact that she worries about what her family would wear. Before, the women sewed clothes at home, today it would be referred to the shopping, washing and ironing clothes. She creates with her hands, she works. She is a woman who has a brilliant mind, valuable and energetic spirit. She is a woman who has many gifts and talents. Virtuous women are concerned about what her family will eat; they buy food, store it, and cook it. They take care that the food is fresh and healthy, to fortify her family. Laziness has no place in her life, she rises above all, preparing their food waiting for them so when her family members wake up, they could eat, she gives small chores among her children to teach them responsibility and discipline.

            She is strong in spirit, verse 17 we associate with Ephesians 6: ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. ¹⁸ And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
            A virtuous woman at night takes care of her family, thinking about tomorrow, what she will give them, what she needs to do and above all, she stays awake and pray for them. She performs chores willingly, she is not selfish, she is helping people in need, clothe the poor, washing homeless, and feed the hungry. She is ready for winter.
            She is not decorating her body with jewelry, expensive dresses, makeup, and hair. She is adorned with virtue and beauty, a smile, a gentle and wise words, she is lovely, obedient to her husband, she is in awe for God, living in purity, with calm spirit, compassionate, merciful, humble, not returning evil for evil, blesses (1 Peter 3:1-10 ), pray in every place, adorned with good works ( 1 Timothy 2:9-15 ), all of which makes it seem as if the Lord does ( Colossians 3:23 ), she is patient, forgiving, dressed in love, thankful (Colossians 3:12-17 ).

            Virtuous women properly educate her children; they follow God, to be diligent and obedient. Her family loves her; thank her for all she does for them. Besides being hardworking and a good hostess, she makes linen garments and sells them - as the text says. It could be any hobby that she does, but the husband brings the main income and financial provides family. She cares of how much and what she eats does not eat too much nor too little. First take care of her environment and then takes care of herself.
            Many women are educated and wise, many are skilled in doing many things, but rarely are virtuous and that kind of woman raises above all these women. Beauty perishes but her character is stronger and better, her life is an example to others, she is an inspiration, support and help to the people around her. Her life with God is exemplary and commendable. She does not even need to say a word; it's her way of life that speaks for her. Because of whom she is and what she is doing, she gained a great reputation in her environment, many honor her, and seek advice from her because they know that she received wisdom from the Lord because of her obedience to him.

Are we women after God's character?

            Seek ye first the kingdom of God: reject the lie that someone or something can not satisfy you, only God can. Stay humble: Be constantly aware of pride and selfishness. Do not think little of yourself but think less about you. Serve God. Point your mind on eternity; serve your king, live to celebrate. Be a woman of quiet spirit, known for her good heart, a good reputation for her service. Be a woman who follows the will of her Heavenly Father. Be a woman who cares about love, to serve, to honor and praise God, then you will know who is more valuable than others. The fact that you are a woman does not make you a different kind of Christian, but the fact that you are a Christian makes you a different kind of woman.

            "When your love is seasoned by grace, you serve others both the good and the evil. Virtuous woman is not controlled by passion, she longs with passion for incomparable God. Her love is overflowing out of her house and in the surrounding area. She tries to be patient and gentle towards her husband, skillfully knowing his heart. Isn’t so much a lesson on getting up early, sewing clothes, buying a field, or achieving perfection. The heart of the matter is that she was dedicated to walking in virtue. She cared deeply for her husband and children. She put the needs of her family before her desires. She was a woman of noble character who walked by faith. My guess is, she wasn’t perfect–none of us are. But she was ready and willing to be perfected by God. "- Darlene Schacht

             If you are married, you might want to look these verses as well, and I think that they don’t need much further explanation. If you still have some questions, fell free to ask.

1 Timothy 2:9,15

1 Corinthians 14:34,40

 Thessalonians 5:22.33

 Colossians 3:12-21

1 Peter 3: 1.7

Who am I in God?

            I grew up in a Christian family. Seemingly, everything was ok; we were all healthy and happy. Then I suddenly began to gain weight uncontrollably, unconnected with anything. I ate the same food as my family and in smaller quantity but something was wrong. Even today I don’t know what went wrong, but it doesn’t matter anymore. In elementary school I weighed a lot. You can guess the amount and diversity of nicknames and snide comments by my pears. In all that fighting I am thankful to have known God and that he had a plan in all that for me and led everything to good to the one who loves him with a pure heart.

            I’ve been into photography actively for five years now. I’m finishing a degree in Applied Photography and am in contact with the media. Who among you is buying some kind of a magazine? What do you see and find in them? Have you ever thought I would love to be one of those people on the cover? Have you ever said I have nothing to wear?

            Considering that most of us are far from perfect, that can create insecurity within us in a ‘what are they gonna say or think about me, will they notice my nose, neck, eyebrows, teeth, ears' etc.  What is he looking at on me, something must be wrong’ sense and that has a side effect of fear. Fear of rejection makes us forget what it does to a person. If we think about our faults and have insecurity, others will surely notice it. But even if they don’t notice our ‘imperfection’ that’s not the reason for us to feel deprived, left aside and humiliated and to believe everything that they tell us.  An opinion of a single person isn’t an opinion of society. If that person is important to us their opinion will be important and if not, their opinion won’t have that power in us. We give meaning to words. If you’re aware of your fault, someone noticing it and saying it won’t reach you because you have solved it with yourself. If you haven’t, every time someone points a finger at your fault (though an object of ridicule doesn’t have to be a fault) you will automatically feel ashamed humiliated and embarrassed which probably is the goal of the opposite side. Some will probably do it without thinking and without intention to hurt us but they will. God knows very well what you’re missing and what you’re not. You shouldn’t go down to their level. Photos in a magazine are worked on and there isn’t a photo in a paper that didn’t go through a change. Some changes are drastic.

            Working in media I often come across slim, tight, well shaped bodies. Their faces are pure skinned, hair is fanned, their makeup is very neatly done, and then you look at yourself and listen to what people say about you and it gets hard to form a proper picture of who you really are. The world has its own norms and understandings but God says something different. For a long time I was mad at God in a way. I didn’t understand why if we were all made in his shape, equal, why are some of us so beautiful, accepted and loved and some are ridiculed and made fun of? I didn’t understand why if we are all his children, why are some favored in society and others always rejected and alone. For a long time I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t look in the face of a creature of God and accept that I was wonderfully made, loved, his royal priesthood, his bride. Even though I was actively doing sports, going to competitions was a good student and somewhat good child; I was praised by my achievements but never accepted by my pears. I was never good enough I could never fit in in what the media made beautiful and good. Comments like you don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t go out clubbing, we don’t need you because of that, never reached me. I clearly saw that it wasn’t God’s intention, not his way. But when you need to look at yourself in the mirror and thank God, that’s when you choke. To look at yourself and say you’re wonderfully made, and instead you see a balloon or a caricature of an animal. It got to a point where not even my family called me by my name but they used the names my pears gave me. In the family that was Piggy or Cow and among pears Miss Piggy.

            Even though I hated my body, the Lord was feeding my spirit. In him were my eternal consolations while I spent the nights crying. In his arms all the tears from my face were wiped away while I listened to the songs of worship and shouted at him on my knees. If we were all made in your shape, loved, why is my life so miserable? The process of accepting myself physically took years and I can’t say it’s completely reached. But in the moment we truly accept what God has for our lives, the change appears.

            I fought for a long time to be accepted but for sure, until I accepted that he loves me, that he pours his love on me, that he calls me his child and heir, I couldn’t go on. (I John’s 3:1) he loves us so much, unconditionally and perfectly, he knows everything about us. If the people around you could see everything about you, your thoughts, feelings and what you do in secrecy, would they love you? In spite all that, he loves us and he gave his only son to die for us, US, nothing as we are, so we could enjoy unity with him forever. In resurrected Christ, we can walk in a new life so that we can reflect Father’s glory. (I Peter’s 2:9) Why do we then prevent him from doing that? If we love him, if we’re thankful for what he’s done for us, what prevents us from living life in the fullest, as he wants us to, with all the virtues? Don’t let the world define you, they don’t have the right to it. Satan tries that always, the media, thoughts, and opinions of other people. You are defined by Christ. As long as we look upon him and desire to live in his presence, everything will fall in place. As soon as we reject ourselves and our body and turn our spirit to him so he can lead and shape, everything around us will be less important. Do you think David had it easy? A small unseeing boy standing in front of the giant soldier, Goliath. When people were laughing they weren’t laughing at David but God within him. It’s the same today, things people say to you, they are not saying to you but to God. David stood in front Goliath in faith and authority and he didn’t fight but God fought for him. If David wasn’t obedient and humble, he wouldn’t have had victory in God. God is our shepherd, we should fear no evil, he set the dinner table in sight of our enemies. That means we are in unity with our enemies but we shouldn’t forget that God is always with us and that he guards our steps so that we do not fall. After all we are God’s mirthful song, determined to do good deeds.  (Ephesians 2:19)

            We are not here to be burdened with the way we look or to fight with problems, Jesus already won for us. We shouldn’t be obsessed with ourselves but let Christ be the measure of everything in our lives. Because you believe in Christ it doesn’t mean everything will be nice and easy. If you follow Jesus Christ, you MUST go through some sort of suffering and you’ll definitely suffer. Through the suffering you should praise God. I always say: ‘When God comes first, everything is in its place’. If my eyes are focused on Jesus, on the cross of Golgotha and that which was done for us, nothing, not media nor opinions, not even temptations will stop me from praising God.

            It’s not about what you see in the mirror, but about the fear of rejection from our loved ones and friends. If you deal with fear you’ve dealt with your image problem. As long as you’re afraid about what others will say about your nose, ears, teeth, you’ll be paralyzed when you realize God accepts you the way you are and that he has a path for you, everything else becomes less important or not at all. First you have to admit to yourself I have ears like that and nose like this and what you can’t change, leave it to him. He then takes responsibility for your nose, teeth even your life.  

            The real image isn’t in the newspapers, magazines or the internet, but in God’s word. God’s plan doesn’t include just our looks but much more. If God is leading your life, accept that there’s a reason why you were made the way you are. Our looks don’t determine our future. Something bigger is involved with our future that God imagined aside from looks. You’ll never discover that if you first don’t accept what you’ve been given and start from there. That’s when change begins.

            The first step to becoming what God has determined for us to become is stop worrying about what other people want us to become. Let’s reshape into a new creature in him.

Until we make our peace with him we are his enemies. (Romans 5:11)

Accept that we should not fear because he’s fighting this battle for us. (V Moses 3:22)

Be brave cause he is with us where ever we go. (Joshua 1:9)

Yearn to see his goodness because it helps us and comforts us.  (Psalm 86:17)

What can the enemy do when he is with us? (Hebrews 13:6)

In Christ we will flourish, we have hope for the future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

God doesn’t care how we look like; he looks at our hearts, why do we fight so much? (I Samuel 16:7)

He chose us and he loves us; he has clothed us in compassion, kindness, humbleness, gentleness and patience, do we need more than this? (Colossians 3:12)

We are already new creatures, accepted, devoted, winners in Christ; they won’t overpower us no matter what they say. (II Cor. 5:17, Rom. 15:7, I Cor. 1:2, II Cor. 2:14)

The Lord has covered us, put us on his palm. You have made everything in us and you know everything about us, even our very end. (Psalm 139)

            When I have accepted that everything is mine in him, I gave myself to him, leaned on his word more honestly; my spirit was changing, healing. Even today I can’t easily stand in front of the window, but my spirit has peace in beautiful almighty God. God didn’t say it will be easy but he promised he will be with us and that this path will be worth it.  And it was. Now I can serve him better where ever he takes me. I happily accept because I know that he knows what’s best for me, what I need, where he wants to use me and what he wants to teach me.


Translation from Serbian done by Aleksandar Dimitrijevic

Clothed in modesty

           When I started this research and thought about this question - how should we dress as Christian girls? - Many said to me that it reminded them of Muslim clothing and grandmas. I want to tell you, you can be fashionable and modest at the same time; you just have to remind yourself of some unwritten rules and your conscience. In this text, I will share a few thoughts, combined with some opinions, and ideas from a number of videos I have seen about modesty and add stories and photos of a few people I have met who I can say are willing to be modest and decent.

       The fashion industry and media today puts a lot of pressure on young people. Most of them are confused and follow false rules, not knowing whether they are right or wrong. Good teachers are rare and very few are bold enough to talk about this. People find it normal to put on whatever they can buy in stores. But the most important question of all, ladies, is - are you clothed in modesty (or - dressed modestly)?

        Have any of you ever wondered what message you are sending with your clothes? And if your body could talk, what would it say? Do you have any shame or respect?

         Your body is a temple of God. How do you treat it? Do you care about it? We were created naked, but sin made us ashamed. The interesting part is, Adam and Eve covered so little, they covered their hips, but God took animal skin, and covered them properly. He made them some kind of tunics (Genesis 3:7) We have freedom to choose our clothes, and the choice we make screams out our spiritual state. I think that most young people have forgotten how to blush and be modest. Your skin should be known by your husband, not by everyone around. Today's bikinis are so sinful, but we find them all right because everyone wears them. Everyone sins, so should we? Not at all.

       Why do girls dress up and wear make up? You would say to be beautiful. Everyone is created in God's image, aren't we then wonderfully made? Yet you try to get attention from boys with your clothing. You have all the attention you need in God. Your beauty isn't on the outside, it is in you. One of my friends said: I don't need a girl who looks like Barbie if she can't say one normal sentence. And it's true. We pay so much attention to our appearance, that we don't have time to read and educate ourselves. Also, girls are so competitive in the way they dress; they try to look better than others by wearing a certain outfit, and if they see someone dressed like them, it’s the end of the world. We try to stand out. But to stand out doesn't mean you have to show off. It means to cover yourself up so that people would be interested in meeting you. Showing your curves and skin makes them want you and have you by just looking at you. They may be so attracted to you that even if they would like to talk with you and get to know you, it would be so hard to concentrate on your words. If you want real love, and I believe you do, don’t let them have your outside but make them seek your inside. Are you proud just of your body or are you proud of who you are? Remember, boys need to be challenged to be gentlemen. Colossians 3:12-14 says: "Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

       When you go to church, you try to look good, showing respect to God. Somehow today it has become a place to show off. Did you come to a church or a catwalk? There is no need to show your legs, stomach and chest. Boys are weak when they see your skin. But skin is not the only thing that bothers them. Wearing clothes that are too tight also makes them stumble. Wearing tights and body shirts that cover your skin won't help at all. Your curves will be there, it will look like your clothes are painted on you. Try to buy things that are a number or two bigger than your size, but be careful not to buy tops that are too big. If you need to lean over, be careful, you might fall out. If you like bigger tops, try to wear something tighter underneath the big top, so that when you lean over, nothing will be seen.

       It is hard to set up rules on size and appearance. Each girl has a different type of body. One thing that looks great on one girl could look bad on the other. I was asking boys about their opinion on certain things. Together with them, I concluded, there are a few areas that just HAVE to be covered and not emphasized with tight clothes. Wearing short skirts and pants we all know is just not a good idea in church or in public. The more skin you show off on your legs, the more boys will look at them. No matter what size you are, tall or short, how well your muscles are toned, it is just not right. The proper length should be around your knees, slightly under or above. Wearing tight jeans that reveal the shape of your bottom, looking like the jeans could tear apart any second… Why would you do that? Firstly it’s not comfortable and secondly it’s not a nice sight and most of all, it’s certainly not modest. To reveal your stomach area we all know is not proper; that also applies to the chest area. I came across a few opinions about naked shoulders and wearing shirts with straps. We agreed that if someone is looking at your strap, their eyes will soon slide to your chest area. Shirts where you can see your bra straps are more dangerous. It makes a man think about your bra, yes, it does. So, try to hide them as much as you can. If you wear sleeveless shirts, try to cover your shoulders with a scarf or something similar.

        Maybe you say if you show some little it is not that bad, but IT IS NOT GOOD EITHER. You can always find someone who is worst than you, but you have to look up on someone who is better than you. Please don’t get numb. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. With covering yourself properly, you are serving both God and your brothers. The way you dress is personal and public statement of who you are and represents your purity. Modesty is decency and humility. Woman, dressed modestly is like candle. She humbly glows slowly, she radiates the positive attitude, and she is worm and mysterious and last long. You have the power to control or to destroy. Choosing to pay attention to your inner beauty according to Bible, you are controlling. "Humility is the proper attitude towards greatness, and I think that modesty is the proper attitude toward a woman's body." Jason Evert. In 1 Timothy 2:9-10 says: "I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God." So does it say in 1 Peter 3:3-4:" Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." When you cover your body, you are not hiding yourself from world; you are revealing your dignity and your spirit. You are proving to others that you are worth waiting to be seen. Teach boys what kind of love you deserve by the way you are dressing. Cover yourself and show you are worthy, serve God and serve your brothers.